News Taffy

Let’s talk about sex, shall we? It seems like more of us are talking about sex lately. Or at least discussing other people’s sex lives. More specifically the insanely intense and not so “normal” sex lives of the characters in E.L. James trilogy of books, Fifty Shades of Grey. If you have read the books, you know exactly what I am talking about, right? If you haven’t read them, you’ve more than likely heard the buzz about them and have an idea of the subject matter. Everyone is talking about the trilogy, even senior citizens on the city bus!

With all of the conversations swirling around the erotic world of the characters in the books, it only seems fitting to have a more practical “how to” sex book of sorts for the rest of us to refer to-IF we need to do so. I recently met former Melrose Place star and Dancing With the Stars contestant, Lisa Rinna on a rainy Wednesday in a Union Square coffee bar lounge. She along with, Dr. Ian Kerner, a sex therapist and author, have co-authored the The Big Fun Sexy Sex Book. In a talk moderated by The Moms, Rinna and Dr. Kerner talked frankly about the business of getting busy.

I was shocked to hear Rinna, a Hollywood bombshell and mother of two, talk candidly about her postpartum depression and her lack of sexual desire. Looking at her, you might find this hard to believe. I did. I mean, she has posed for Playboy twice, once while pregnant, for goodness sakes. She’s got an amazing figure and then there are those lips of hers. Say what you want about her lips, but they give her an Angelina Jolie-ness quality. The combination of the big sexy hair, boobs and lips makes it hard to see how she could not feel sexy or desirable. But, that is what post partum depression will do to a woman.

Rinna went to great lengths to put the sizzle back into her marriage to actor Harry Hamlin. The two have been married for nearly 20 years. As many married couples will tell you, keeping the spark in your sex life takes a lot of work. Especially if your fire was extinguished after the birth of your children and you are trying to rekindle the flame.

The book covers every topic from the simplest most innocent thing such as hugging your lover to full on BDSM and role playing. Don’t know what BDSM is? Google it! Or better yet, read Fifty Shades of Grey if you’re really interested in finding out. Rinna’s book reads a bit like a text book, but with some real life scenarios. If talking about sex with your partner or friends makes you turn fifty shades of red, then you may want to read the book. You’ll be in the know on all things sex related and you won’t have to speak one word about it.

The women in the room asked a variety of questions. How do I stop thinking about the mortgage and bills when we are having sex? What if the kids hear us or walk in on us while we are having sex? I am approaching menopause and things aren’t working like they once worked, what should I do? What if I have more interest in sex than my husband?

Do any of those sound familiar to you? Probably so, I would say. Most of us have the same questions, concerns; hang ups and interests in sex, but may find it hard to express them or act on them. The conversation left everyone talking even after the former centerfold started signing her book.

I laughed when I saw the KY goodie-bags and the small bottles of champagne in the room. The event was sponsored by KY and Martini and Rossi. I love a glass of champagne, but not before lunch on a Wednesday. As for the bag, I made sure I turned it around so the KY logo was facing me before I walked back to the subway. I didn’t want to send the wrong message in the underground world of Manhattan by advertising for KY. You don’t want give the wrong impression after all.

You can read more about D.J.’s adventures in the Big Apple at www.djduckworthyoga.com/blog follow her on Twitter @mrsdjduckworth and on Facebook. D.J. is also a contributor to www.themoms.com and New York Family magazine.